Seriously? I Guess $50 wasn’t Enough.

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So a week or so ago, I asked blog readers, potential customers, and Facebook friends to contribute their ideas for creating a new pinball game- as long as it was nostalgic and met a few other criteria- and I would offer $50 if I chose to used your idea in a future design.

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So far, my favorite idea is one of my own that I am building now- “Alien Abduction”- a prototype flying saucer can be seen in the photo. Picture this saucer with a blue “tracker beam” hovering low over cornfields looking to levitate cows- with all of this fitting into the back glass of a pinball machine. More details as to how this will work for scoring to be forthcoming…

But I digress. This is not about me, this is about the collective “you”. You are letting me down.

I received a handful of ideas- including several sent through email (rather than in the blog comments), but all in all I am underwhelmed by the lack of interest. The ideas that I did get do have promise- so “thank you Bob”- and if any of them become a reality, I will be forwarding a royalty check to the idea man or woman. But “Alien Abduction” is what I’m going with for now.

The offer still stands- $50 for any ideas that I end up using in a design- or 50% of one of my “donor machines” if you want one for a commissioned project.

Also, a few loose ends to tie back to some previous themes:

1. My “Night of the Living Dead” back glass design– the one with a backlit fog effect- has been accepted as a Senior Design Project for the Roger Williams University Engineering Department. This is very exciting since I like mentoring the engineering students, and since hopefully they can help me come up with a good way to manage fog production in an enclosed glass case.

2. Jacquizz Rodgers is not panning out as the Fantasy Football League stud that I thought he would. He had one catch for -1 yards, and no yards rushing. This resulted in a grand total of 1 fantasy point.

3. There no longer seems to be a market for the Cumberland Farms/David Hasselhoff iced coffee ad cardboard cutouts. I have one in my possession. Don’t ask how or why.

4. I refuse to believe that summer is over. Do not try to convince me otherwise.

5. My baby girl Amanda is turning 21 next week. I refuse to believe this either. Do not try to convince me otherwise.

And finally, spend 30 seconds thinking of a good ( or even a bad) idea for a game theme and list them in the comments. $50 is real money. Believe it!

Fantasy Football and David Hasselhoff

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For those of you not familiar with Cumberland Farms, it is a family owned chain of gas stations and convenience stores located mostly in New England. There is one down the road from us where I usually purchase my gasoline. Several months ago, I was shocked to see former Bay Watch and TV semi-star David Hasselhoff’s somewhat bloated image plastered around the Cumberland Farms store and parking lot.

The image is prominent and repeated: As I pull into the lot, David’s life-sized image- fully clothed but still riding a surf board- smirks me into thinking about how odd he now seems, even as he tempts me with a refreshing beverage…. I’m pumping gas, David is eyeing me up, fluffing up his chest hair, offering me a mega-serving of iced coffee…. I make out a 99 cent gold medallion around his neck- reminding me within his chest-forest that the drink is less than a buck….. I go inside to purchase something else and -dammit- there he is again- cloned on every wall- a Jurassic-Parkesque scare tactic that makes me consider purchasing a delicious iced beverage. It’s under a dollar after all.

It seems that I am not alone in being hypnotized by sir Hoff’s glare and stare, fluffed chest hair. There has been a recent crime wave of sorts, as Rhode Islanders and neighbors are stealing the large Hoff parking lot signs from stores around the region. One brave employee recently risked his life protecting one of the sought after prizes. David himself expressed concern after hearing that this employee was injured in the line of duty- guarding one of the remaining signs from theft. Hoff tweeted his regret, and by all accounts it was a most sincere tweet.

Unfortunately, all of the above is true.

After shaking myself out of my trance, I reflected on the most disturbing aspects of this ad campaign. In no particular order, I offer these thoughts:

1. If you are surfing, why would you wear a long sleeve shirt and long pants?
2. How can you surf and drink coffee at the same time? This seems like trick photography or something.
3. In Jurassic Park, why was there a porta-potty in the middle of the T-Rex enclosure? This seems a bit contrived and I suspect was there simply so the lawyer could go into it and be exposed and eaten by the dinosaur.
4. Is David Hasselhoff getting career advice from William Shatner?
5. Did anybody see the Sponge Bob movie? The German people worshipped Hoff.
6. Does Germany have eBay? If so, can someone help me post something for sale there. Don’t worry about what it is. That’s my business.

On a related, note, I’m a bit nervous about my first fantasy football draft this Sunday. Anyone have any advice? Here is my logo for my team. Notice there is nothing this week about custom pinball machines- but I have a new idea for a design….

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